Lycaon Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/arti...in_page_id=1770 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court. I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue. The old man kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time. When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, “What’s the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?” The old man did not bat an eye in his response, “Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident. Who was the survivor? (Scroll down for the answer.) The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man. Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke. Men keep scrolling****. So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident. By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: women never listen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 (edited) cool misirlou Edited June 10, 2007 by alive she cried Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 10, 2007 Share Posted June 10, 2007 real misirlou look at the background players, their faces are fuckin' priceless Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 br0kenrabbit says:hi Greg_ValveOLS says: good evening br0kenrabbit says: What's ip? br0kenrabbit says: up? Greg_ValveOLS says: my name is greg a member of the valve online Support team br0kenrabbit says: On MSN? Greg_ValveOLS says: yes br0kenrabbit says: Why? Greg_ValveOLS says: we logged multiple ips from your account and ned to verifi your information br0kenrabbit says: My information? Greg_ValveOLS says: we believe someone may have stolen your account mmmm you havent shared youre account infomation with anyone have you? br0kenrabbit says: No. I don't even have it written down. Greg_ValveOLS says: hmmm maybe a keylogger on you r PC then maybe you need a format? br0kenrabbit says: Well... Greg_ValveOLS says: if you can verify your account information to me i can insure that only your ip have access to it Its a new security feature were trying because this happens so muchlogin names and passwords aint safe anymroe You know. L:) br0kenrabbit says: Well Greg_ValveOLS says: dont worry this connect it secure br0kenrabbit says: Can I be honest with you, Greg? Greg_ValveOLS says: k br0kenrabbit says: Look, I don't know how you go this MSN account name, don't really care, either. br0kenrabbit says: Unlike you, I DO work for Valve. Trace my ip and you'll see. Greg_ValveOLS says: huh? Greg_ValveOLS says: bs br0kenrabbit says: Trace it. Greg_ValveOLS says: how br0kenrabbit says: Start/run/cmd type Tracert and then my IP address and hit enter. Greg_ValveOLS says: oh k br0kenrabbit says: As an employee, I know that Valve employees will NEVER contact users over MSN. I also know a valve employee will NEVER ask a user for his/her username and password. br0kenrabbit says: I'm putting a temporary hold on your Steam account. Greg_ValveOLS says: why? br0kenrabbit says: Have you read the ToS? Greg_ValveOLS says: Tod? Greg_ValveOLS says: tos br0kenrabbit says: terms of service Greg_ValveOLS says: were? br0kenrabbit says: Greg, this is a serious infraction against the Tos. You are at risk of losing your account. Greg_ValveOLS says: why br0kenrabbit says: I just told you why Greg_ValveOLS says: :( br0kenrabbit says: I need some information from you if you want me to unlock you account. I'm going to write you up but I will only suspend you account for three days, since this is your first infraction, okay? Greg_ValveOLS says: k br0kenrabbit says: First, what is the name the account is registered to. Not the user name, the persons real name who created the account. This is for verification purposes. Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxx xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Is this you? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Are you the only user of this account? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Okay, and what is the username Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Okay. br0kenrabbit says: I see you have purchased a few of our games, thank you. Greg_ValveOLS says: some. dude Greg_ValveOLS says: m br0kenrabbit says: Do you always log on from the same IP? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: And who is your internet providers, your ISP? Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Thank you. One moment, please, let me verify this information. Greg_ValveOLS says: am i gonna be bale to play 2nite? br0kenrabbit says: What is your city of residence? br0kenrabbit says: That depends on if you cooperate. You're doing fine so far. Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Illinios? Greg_ValveOLS says: yes br0kenrabbit says: Okay. And what is the password associated with this account? Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Okay. Do not try to log into steam. If you are connected now you need to log off. Greg_ValveOLS says: why br0kenrabbit says: So I can update your account. Greg_ValveOLS says: can I play 2 nite Greg_ValveOLS says: clan fight Greg_ValveOLS says: wont win without me heh br0kenrabbit says: Heh. You'll have to wait a few minutes. Are you logged off? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Okay. Give me just a moment. br0kenrabbit says: Try to log in now. Greg_ValveOLS says: k Greg_ValveOLS says: It says login failed wtf wtf!!@? br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: did u ban me???????????>WHY br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: what br0kenrabbit says: Valve will never ask for your username and password. Greg_ValveOLS says: what???? br0kenrabbit says: I don't work for Valve dude, but you just got pwnt. Greg_ValveOLS says: omg dude wtf why? br0kenrabbit says: Why were you trying to steal my account? Greg_ValveOLS says: i wanst br0kenrabbit says: Then why were you asking for my information? Greg_ValveOLS says: i was just making a joke but not cerious honest dude just give my acount back pllllleeease i'm only 13 and save d up for like a year to buy it br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: dude pleas Greg_ValveOLS says: what br0kenrabbit says: Go mow some yards, bitch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 How the union won america's civl war: The True Story Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 this was just aired over here today, seems spot on from what i know about fox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 haha, this is the best instruction manual ive ever seen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archangel Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 br0kenrabbit says:hi Greg_ValveOLS says: good evening br0kenrabbit says: What's ip? br0kenrabbit says: up? Greg_ValveOLS says: my name is greg a member of the valve online Support team br0kenrabbit says: On MSN? Greg_ValveOLS says: yes br0kenrabbit says: Why? Greg_ValveOLS says: we logged multiple ips from your account and ned to verifi your information br0kenrabbit says: My information? Greg_ValveOLS says: we believe someone may have stolen your account mmmm you havent shared youre account infomation with anyone have you? br0kenrabbit says: No. I don't even have it written down. Greg_ValveOLS says: hmmm maybe a keylogger on you r PC then maybe you need a format? br0kenrabbit says: Well... Greg_ValveOLS says: if you can verify your account information to me i can insure that only your ip have access to it Its a new security feature were trying because this happens so muchlogin names and passwords aint safe anymroe You know. L:) br0kenrabbit says: Well Greg_ValveOLS says: dont worry this connect it secure br0kenrabbit says: Can I be honest with you, Greg? Greg_ValveOLS says: k br0kenrabbit says: Look, I don't know how you go this MSN account name, don't really care, either. br0kenrabbit says: Unlike you, I DO work for Valve. Trace my ip and you'll see. Greg_ValveOLS says: huh? Greg_ValveOLS says: bs br0kenrabbit says: Trace it. Greg_ValveOLS says: how br0kenrabbit says: Start/run/cmd type Tracert and then my IP address and hit enter. Greg_ValveOLS says: oh k br0kenrabbit says: As an employee, I know that Valve employees will NEVER contact users over MSN. I also know a valve employee will NEVER ask a user for his/her username and password. br0kenrabbit says: I'm putting a temporary hold on your Steam account. Greg_ValveOLS says: why? br0kenrabbit says: Have you read the ToS? Greg_ValveOLS says: Tod? Greg_ValveOLS says: tos br0kenrabbit says: terms of service Greg_ValveOLS says: were? br0kenrabbit says: Greg, this is a serious infraction against the Tos. You are at risk of losing your account. Greg_ValveOLS says: why br0kenrabbit says: I just told you why Greg_ValveOLS says: :( br0kenrabbit says: I need some information from you if you want me to unlock you account. I'm going to write you up but I will only suspend you account for three days, since this is your first infraction, okay? Greg_ValveOLS says: k br0kenrabbit says: First, what is the name the account is registered to. Not the user name, the persons real name who created the account. This is for verification purposes. Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxx xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Is this you? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Are you the only user of this account? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Okay, and what is the username Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Okay. br0kenrabbit says: I see you have purchased a few of our games, thank you. Greg_ValveOLS says: some. dude Greg_ValveOLS says: m br0kenrabbit says: Do you always log on from the same IP? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: And who is your internet providers, your ISP? Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Thank you. One moment, please, let me verify this information. Greg_ValveOLS says: am i gonna be bale to play 2nite? br0kenrabbit says: What is your city of residence? br0kenrabbit says: That depends on if you cooperate. You're doing fine so far. Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Illinios? Greg_ValveOLS says: yes br0kenrabbit says: Okay. And what is the password associated with this account? Greg_ValveOLS says: xxxxxxx br0kenrabbit says: Okay. Do not try to log into steam. If you are connected now you need to log off. Greg_ValveOLS says: why br0kenrabbit says: So I can update your account. Greg_ValveOLS says: can I play 2 nite Greg_ValveOLS says: clan fight Greg_ValveOLS says: wont win without me heh br0kenrabbit says: Heh. You'll have to wait a few minutes. Are you logged off? Greg_ValveOLS says: ya br0kenrabbit says: Okay. Give me just a moment. br0kenrabbit says: Try to log in now. Greg_ValveOLS says: k Greg_ValveOLS says: It says login failed wtf wtf!!@? br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: did u ban me???????????>WHY br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: what br0kenrabbit says: Valve will never ask for your username and password. Greg_ValveOLS says: what???? br0kenrabbit says: I don't work for Valve dude, but you just got pwnt. Greg_ValveOLS says: omg dude wtf why? br0kenrabbit says: Why were you trying to steal my account? Greg_ValveOLS says: i wanst br0kenrabbit says: Then why were you asking for my information? Greg_ValveOLS says: i was just making a joke but not cerious honest dude just give my acount back pllllleeease i'm only 13 and save d up for like a year to buy it br0kenrabbit says: Greg Greg_ValveOLS says: dude pleas Greg_ValveOLS says: what br0kenrabbit says: Go mow some yards, bitch. Wow. That was awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ganny McVagflaps Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 No cable in my room makes me a sad panda. I just wanna watch the last Sopranos on demand damn it and fucking demonoid is taking forever....CUNTS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The NZA Posted June 11, 2007 Author Share Posted June 11, 2007 damn you, midway. i swear to god, youre gonna pass on gold with NBA Jam and no doubt, next "big update!' is gonna be fucking ROOT BEER TAPPER in glorious 1080p or some shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Losifer Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 (edited) FAKK!!! I'm so bored at werk...i should have spread my werk across the month. The shit I tell myself... Just do it all on Day One, you might have important shit to do later, Carlos... Last time i do that. U____U' Edited June 11, 2007 by Losifer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycaon Posted June 11, 2007 Share Posted June 11, 2007 Wow. That was awesome Indeed. Been floating around for quite a while, but still awesome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 (edited) Edited June 12, 2007 by newtype Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 (edited) Edited June 12, 2007 by newtype Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newtype Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 oh god yes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alive she cried Posted June 12, 2007 Share Posted June 12, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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